Vacation Justification

Snorkeling in Mexico

We will soon need a new roof. The stairs that lead up from the driveway tilt at an angle that’s disconcerting and frankly, dangerous when even slightly slick. Converting to natural gas would probably save us a lot of money long term. Perhaps overly sensitive to the cold, last winter I swore we would get a pellet stove insert for the inefficient fireplace in our living room.


I’ve got an 11 year old with teenage tastes. She’s got an iPhone. She wants a laptop. She’s got a fashion sense of her own now and I can’t get away with less expensive clothing anymore. Voice lessons. Gymnastics. A whole new school year ahead of us with higher after school care costs and hot lunch has gone up as well.

Build confidence.  Try new things.  It's good for you.

My point is that we have better things we should be doing with our money than thinking about vacation.

Suze Orman would scold us. Her show has a segment called “Can I afford it?” We watched it a while back as she denied a caller who made much more than we do and had quite a sum in savings. The man and his wife wanted to spend $2500 to take their two little kids to Disney World. The woman denied Disney! She said take them when they’re teenagers, a decade into the future, because they’ll remember it more. What about the creation of memories NOW? What about the value of the experience? How does that translate into an asset?

Well, that’s a good question. In search of justification – and NO I will not be calling into Suze’s show – I thought I’d do a little research into the benefits of vacation, a break from the stress and strains of daily life.

Okay. To the proof:

Don't we look healthy?  Two years ago in Mexico.

HEALTH BENEFITS

Plodding along at the office might get you brownie points with the boss, but can be detrimental to your overall health and wellbeing. Being stressed for long periods of time without a break has been shown to lead to higher blood pressure and an increase in coronary heart disease. If you are a female, taking a vacation can cut this risk by half, according to a study conducted at the State University of New York. Stress can impair hippocampus function, too, making it more difficult to acquire new information, like people’s names, meeting times and dates, and things like logins and PINs. A study quoted in Forbes.com showed that women who took vacations more frequently were less likely to become tense or depressed, and also reported being more satisfied in their marriages. Remember that your physical and mental health have a direct link to your social and psychological outlook on life. bottom line on this one is that the more you vacation, the more likely you are to be healthy and enjoy life.

From a financial perspective, being sick is expensive! Staying healthy can save you money on doctor and medical bills. Taking a vacation can reduce the stress triggered health ailments that wear you down and less money will be spent dealing with the negative consequences of poor health.

Me & my daughter at Virginia Beach.

STREGNTHEN BONDS IN YOUR RELATIONSHIPS

Vacationing together can strengthen family and marriage bonds. Traveling together is at time harrowing, and making it to your destination can bring a sense of camaraderie and accomplishment. Sharing new experiences and creating memories that can last a lifetime. Partners often reveal new sides of themselves to each other that wouldn’t have been prompted in their home environments.

A quiet moment at the beach.

GET A CREATIVE BOOST

In our day to day lives, we often find ourselves mired in patterns of behavior that don’t leave much room for inspiration. The same morning routine, the same meals, the same TV shows and the same, well, everything might be comfortable but it doesn’t provide the opportunity to explore new ways of thinking. Taking a vacation and travelling out of your regular environment can open your eyes and your mind and bring about self discovery. Being in a foreign setting, we put ourselves in an uncomfortable situation, and this allows our brains to think differently. A good vacation can help us reconnect with ourselves. It satisfies our own human curiosity about other places. It is your moment to explore the world. When was the last time you could PLAY? I mean really play, without phone calls or interruptions. Vacations let you recapture that childlike freedom.



If taking a vacation will bring us closer together, give us better physical and mental health, and promote overall well being then what’s the argument. It would seem that the benefits far outweigh the costs. I’m not suggesting that we deplete our savings to do this. If we didn’t both have steady jobs and a retirement savings going on, I might leave this on the shelf as a dream. But the justification is right there in black and white.

New experiences.

It won’t be long before my eleventeen year old really won’t want to be taking vacations with us, or if she does, no doubt that a friend will be coming along. I feel that I need to seize the opportunity to create these memories with her now, not wait for a later date. I was reminded just last night about how fast the time goes by with children.

I know from experience that when my husband or I is stressed, we tend to have less patience with each other and laugh less frequently. We find ourselves just existing together, not really enjoying each other. That’s not why I got married.

Carpe diem I say. Seize the day. Request the time off. Make the reservation. Pack it up and get away for a bit. It will do you good on so many levels.

Family Travel: Day Trips in the Mayan Riviera

The choice was tough. Icy fresh cut pineapple or mango. Which will best satisfy you as you gaze out over the bluest stretch of water you’ve ever seen? It’s hot and sunny. You’ve just been body surfing below the cliffs of the Mayan ruins at Tulum. You watched a young Mexican boy make his way down the steep jungle path with the cooler tied with a rope around him. He opens it with a grin. Inside, fresh cut fruit is skewered, wrapped in plastic, and packed in ice. Dig out your wet pesos and pay him. It’s sweeter and juicier than any thing you’ll find in the supermarket. Better than you imagined. Refreshed, you dive back into the sea.




The eighty or so miles that stretch between Cancun and Tulum is known as the Riviera Maya, or the Mayan Riviera. New resorts are being built and grand openings abound. They’re beautifully crafted, stunningly located on the aquamarine Caribbean coast of Mexico’s Yucatan Peninsula, and in many cases, all inclusive. That means that you don’t really have to leave the campus to find everything you could possibly need on vacation. There’s abundant sun to frolic in, a variety of restaurants and buffets to savor, frozen drinks to cool you, shops to find the right souvenir of your trip, and the requisite palm treed strung hammocks for seaside napping. If that’s not enough for you, well, you just might be in need of a day trip.

You might recognize the ruins at Tulum from the scenes in the brochures of Mexico. Perched on the Caribbean, their history is as amazing as the view. Go for both. For under $5.00 US per person you can tour the ruins on your own. History markers tell the tale of human sacrifice and devotion to Gods. The word “Tulum” means “walled,” as in walled city. Iguanas rest in the sun on the building’s peaks and foundations. El Castillo or The Castle is the tallest building in the city. The center square was probably used for rituals and ceremonies. It is hot at peak hours of the day, with very little shade. It is easily accessed from Highway 307, about a two hour drive from Cancun. Save some time in your schedule to check out the flea market at the entry. It is packed with silver jewelry, Mexican blankets, hammocks, trinkets and carved wooden statues.

If you’re in the mood to explore the underwater world of the Mayan Riviera, head to Akumal for some amazing snorkeling. There are three places to snorkel. Akumal Bay is home to sea turtles that graze on the sea grass, lazily surfacing for air whenever they think of it. The beach there is dotted with palm trees. You can rent snorkel gear from the Akumal Dive Shop. They have snorkel vests available that allow you to virtually hover over the turtles and rays as they munch. Further out into the bay, the protective reef supports corals and colorful tropical fish. You can jump on one of the boat tours that will take you out there to the known sites. In the sandy center of town, you can rent a golf cart for the day and head down the road, along the shore to the next area, Half Moon Bay. Accessible from many spots along the way, one of the favorites is next door to a great little restaurant for lunch. The Buena Vida has a swing bar and sand floor. You can have a great fish taco and colada with your toes dug in. They have a crow’s nest that the kids love to climb up. From the perch you can see the whole bay, curving in both directions, sheltering a coral studded bay.



After lunch and some shore snorkeling, make your way to the end of the road and the Yal Ku Lagoon. The entry fee is minimal and immensely worth it. There are primitive lockers for your belongings and parking space for the cart. Walk down the lush paths and encounter bronze statues of birds, animals, and people. At the lagoon, there are stairs that lead you into the water which is teeming with fish. Fresh water mixed with the sea and the limestone rocks form a protective harbor for brightly colored parrotfish, schools of yellow striped sergeant majors, and other sea life. The water is not deep, six to twelve feet at most, so you can feel safe bringing the kids. All around the lagoon there are benches, paths, palapas, and statues. When you’re through at the lagoon, make your way back to the center of Akumal and try some homemade ice cream at Lucy’s Kitchen.

The Mayan Riviera is situated on top of the most extensive system of underground rivers and caverns in the world. The caverns that open to the surface are known as cenotes. The water in them is of an unbelievable clarity. If your kids are clamoring for adventure, try Hidden Worlds Cenotes Park. It’s right on highway 307 just north of Tulum. From cycling through the treetops on one of their sky cycles to riding the 600 ft zip line to repelling into a cenote and then riding a zip line to splash down into that same cenote, there’s no lack of whizzing and flying to do at Hidden Worlds. At the end of the sky cycle ride, you enter a cave, don a snorkel vest and gear, and go underground, swimming into a cave where you follow a guide into giant caverns, one so large it has acquired the name “the church” for it’s cathedral ceiling. It’s an amazing under ground and tree top experience. The ride into the jungle, on one of their buggies is an adventure all its own. The kids will come out of this one with stories to tell their friends. The staff at Hidden Worlds is incredibly helpful and friendly, joking with guests, providing insight into the surroundings and wildlife. Special discount rates are available at their website http://www.hiddenworlds.com/.

When you’re ready to get back in the water, go to Xel Ha. . Pronounced “Shell Ha,” this ecopark won’t allow you to use your regular sunscreen. They are so protective of their beautiful environment that you can only use approved eco friendly sunscreen. The self proclaimed “World’s Biggest Aquarium” really is as it suggests. With so many things to do at the park, it’s a wonder that some tour groups actually package a visit here along with a stop at Tulum. Though they are relatively close to each other, Xel Ha deserves its own day trip. Beyond snorkeling in their immense lagoon, where you can circle boulders and swim through avenues traveled by angle fish, Xel Ha has a lazy river where you can climb into a tube from a platform in a mangrove and float down into the lagoon, a leisurely 45 minute ride downstream past cliffs and cliff jumpers. You can pull over anytime at one of the many platforms and take in the scene. The all inclusive rate is definitely the way to go. As well as your park admission, it includes all drinks and food from a variety of cuisines, bicycle and locker rental, towels, snorkel gear and security bags for your belongings. There are deck chairs and hammocks all over. There’s a small shallow inlet for the little kids to play. There’s even an apiary to check out. You can walk through the jungle and cross over the tree top bridge. See a cenote and a grotto. They even have a Snuba program. Take your kids to Xel Ha for an incredible day of fun. Their website is http://www.xelha.com/ and they offer discounted rates online.

Still looking for something to do? A day trip to Cozumel just might satisfy your need for some Mexican culture. The world’s second largest barrier reef runs between the island of Cozumel and the Mexican mainland and the snorkeling there is spectacular, of premium clarity. Corals, eels, tropical fish, urchins, all seem within grasp. You can snorkel from the shore at many places. Take the ferry from Playa Del Carmen. There are two competing ferry lines. They charge the same rate and take the same amount of time to get to the island. The Money Bar Beach club is located right at the Dzul Ha reef. You can take a taxi right from the ferry dock. Their website is http://www.moneybarbeachclub.com/ for more information. Another great place to visit while on Cozumel is the Chakanaab Park. For a very reasonable admission fee, you can use the park’s hammocks, beach chairs, restrooms, showers and huts. You can take snorkel tours, swim with dolphins and manatees, and sea lions for additional fees. Their website is http://www.cozumelparks.com./

The public transportation in this part of Mexico is safe and reliable. The “Collectivo” runs between Cancun and Tulum. You can travel from Playa Del Carmen to Tulum for about $3.00 one way. The collective system moves the population and is not geared specifically for tourists, but many drivers know to park outside of the large resorts for customers. You can also take a taxi. Many of them also wait outside of the resorts waiting for customers. At most resorts, your concierge can call a taxi for you as well. Unless extremely adventurous, you don’t need to rent a car when visiting the area. Public transportation will take you to and from your day trip destinations.

Some very helpful websites geared towards travel in the Mayan Riviera are www.locogringo.com, which is the ultimate travel guide for this area. Read forums and find out about the many choices of hotel resorts. The maps on this site are some of the best, especially the snorkeling maps of Akumal Bay. Another great site for travel in general is www.tripadvisor.com. Read reviews, forums, and recommendations from travelers like you. One of the most well known tour operators for Mexican vacations is Apple Vacations. At their website, http://www.applevacations.com/, you can view flights and resorts. Their rates generally include airport transport to your hotel.



More than just “how to get around” Mapchick’s website http://www.cancunmap.com/ will tell you just about all you need to know about visiting. You can get information about the weather, travel tips, the airport, resorts, fish you’ll see, documents you need, the best time to visit, and read Laura’s (aka “Mapchick”) blog. Her maps are worth the investment for the sidebars alone. She and husband Perry scour the peninsula in search of great spots to visit and eat. They travel the streets with a GPS for accuracy. They’ve made it their (awesome) jobs to provide tourist tidbits to travelers. The maps are $10 each.



So many things to see and do in the Mayan Riviera, you might need more than a week to visit. Despite the day trip information provided here, make it a priority to enjoy yourself. Nap in a hammock. Stay up too late. Eat too much. The natural beauty of the sea and sand and surroundings beg you to chill out a bit. You could easily fall in love with it all and become a loco gringo yourself.

Having Fun: Then and Now

If you would have told me six years ago that I would go to the Caribbean and not have a margarita or pina colada, I would have laughed out loud at the thought. My vision of a day on an island would have most certainly included tropical drinks and a mid afternoon nap in a hammock to sleep it off. Mimosas and Bloody Marys to start the day. Fruity cocktails to keep it going. My days would have revolved around tiki huts and beach bars. When I thought of the Caribbean, that’s what came to mind.




In all honesty, drinking was on the agenda no matter where I was.



My first trip to the Caribbean was to St. Maarten and it was very early in my sobriety. Perhaps 90 days sober when we went, those welcome cocktails at the reception desk and the tray full of passion punch on the catamaran snorkel tour we booked were hard to look at, knowing that I had to decline them. I was really tested on that trip.

Since then, though, we had been to many places and events where alcohol was not only served but encouraged. In Mexico, at our resort, a tequila cart wheeled around at dinnertime, and Kahlua was set right next to the serve yourself coffee. Booking an all inclusive resort, we worried that since we didn’t drink, we wouldn’t get our money’s worth, and even commented, at dinner one evening as that tequila cart was offered to us, that the resort would be losing money if we were drinking. Our in room refrigerator was stocked with beers and champagne and a bottle of tequila had been left as a gift. I had requested that the management remove alcohol from our room, hoping that we would be stocked with more bottled water and sodas. Our neighbors in the villa benefited from the gifts.

I’m a parrothead. That hasn’t changed either. I’m a sober parrothead, though and for me that’s a big change. For the uninitiated, a Parrot head is akin to a Deadhead, back in the days of the Grateful Dead, only in this case, a Parrothead is a fan of Jimmy Buffett. You know Buffett, of Margaritaville fame. If you’ve ever been to a Buffett concert, you know what it’s like. It’s a parking lot full of grass skirts, coconut bras, and blenders whirring. I have now been to two shows sober. And I had just as much fun. Being sober at a Buffett concert didn’t mean that we didn’t participate in the frivolity. We wore the grass skirts and brought a cooler full of food and a jug of frozen concoctions. We walked around the venue and surveyed the activities; the swimming pools and the barbeques, the huge margarita glasses and the drinking games. What’s different about my experience? I can make it through the show. I’m not lost and wandering around the parking lot. I didn’t throw up. We saw plenty of that there. We had VIP Parking so were near the entrance to the venue and watched many a drunk guy or girl make their way through the gates, pouring out the last of their cocktails near the door. Some were held up by others. Some were singing. Some were crying. Some didn’t make it into the show at all. I watched, bemused and grateful for my clarity.

At times it is difficult to live a sober life in a society drenched in alcohol. I am writing today to tell you that you can have fun without drinking. There was a time that I would have baulked at the thought. I believed that everything that was to be enjoyed was to be enjoyed with drinks. All of my favorite things to do back then included drinking, whether it was a picnic, getting together with friends, working in my garden, or just hanging out at home. There was always alcohol. Now having been sober for a few years, I can honestly say that I don’t miss drinking. Those favorite things to do are still some of my favorite things to do and are just as fun doing them sober. More fun in most cases because I remember them. I don’t end up bruised and wondering what happened. I don’t get into arguments and find myself crying. And I’ve discovered new things. Things I love to do now would have not been on the radar back then for one reason: I couldn’t drink while doing them or they would cut into my drinking time. I’m talking about snorkeling, riding zip lines and roller coasters, long hikes and nature walks with my husband, daughter, and friends. I run now. I cook with out burning stuff (most of the time). I can see a project through to the end. Before getting sober, I would have been too anxious doing these things. I would be preoccupied with the whens and hows of my next drink. Sobriety has given me a freedom that I didn’t know before. I am no longer obsessed with alcohol, acquiring it, consuming it, coveting it. The compulsion to drink has left me.

Yes, I made changes to accommodate my new life. In some ways, I changed everything. In reality, yes, my attitude changed, and along with it, so many other things. Today my life is better than I could have imagined. It’s peaceful and happy. Gone is the drama and anxiety that active alcoholic behavior had me entwined in. But I didn’t have to give myself up. I didn’t change my taste in music or my sense of humor. I didn’t alter my style of dress or my love of cooking. My daughter, my husband, my writing and my photography are still my passions, and if anything, the ability to nurture them is increased. A tropical drink is still delicious even without the rum. It took a while for me to be comfortable in situations that had been notoriously intoxicating. I am thankful I had such great support from my then boyfriend now husband, who had been through it and knew about triggers. If you’re new in sobriety, or if your old playgrounds are unsafe for you, don’t go there. Don’t tempt yourself unnecessarily. Don’t put yourself in situations that will make it difficult to stay sober. I’m telling my story so that others might see something useful in my experiences and recognize that life is very far from over when you get sober.

Maine to Mexico

I like to entertain myself during the dismal winter months in Maine by reading books about traveling and living in the tropics. Last summer, one of my favorite reads of 2009 was Queen of the Road by Doreen Orion. Ms. Orion’s chronicling of a year spent on the road, in a huge, luxurious RV, with her polar opposite husband and pets, launched me on a travel lust that sustained me through the aforementioned hideous winter. I got to thinking about the concept of taking a year off from our regular life and doing a little traveling.

Somewhere along the way I found the word “fernwah” which is akin to wanderlust, and means farsickness; or ache for distance. Isn’t that a great word? For some time now, travel has been of focus in my life. My husband, when we were first together, gave me my “first look” at the Caribbean. Then, within a few months, turned me on to roller coasters. Between the two things, I’m always headed somewhere in my mind, either snorkeling with turtles in Akumal, or rounding the crest of the 2nd hill on Millenium Force at Cedar Point.

The concept of a sabbatical is not a new one. Academic types have been doing it for ages. The family sabbatical, though, is something that had never crossed my mind until I began thinking about taking a year off to travel with my husband and kid. Once the seed was planted and research begun, I found incredible resources both in print and online that not only documented other people’s experiences, but justified the whole thing. In the book Six Months Off: How to plan, negotiate, and take the break you need without burning bridges or going broke, by Hope Dlugozima, James Scott, and David Shard, the authors discuss the mental health benefits of a long term break, how it is know that you will return renewed and refreshed with new ideas that you can bring into your life. In Living Your Road Trip Dream by Phil and Carol White, the actual HOW part is addressed, and in The Family Sabbatical Handbook, by Elise Bernick, the HOW TO DO IT WITH KIDS part is precisely spelled out. All of these books and a few others that told tales of packing it all up and moving to an island were my winter reads.

A month or so ago, with all of this whirling around in my head, and the fact that I’d been wearing long johns and two pairs of socks still fresh, I happened upon a business acquaintance who spoke of having just returned from Cancun where he and his wife spent a month. A month! It seemed so indulgent and I was immediately envious. Never mind this wintering in Florida stuff that lots of Mainers do. Of course I couldn’t help but strike up conversation, telling him of our trips to the Riviera Maya, our passion for the place, and my recent reads. He gave me the name and email address of the person from whom he had rented an apartment for a month for cheap. Cheap is a key word in my travel lexicon.



I contacted the man in Mexico with the apartment and was told that whenever I want it it’s ready, just let him know. A month in Mexico! What an idea! While it’s not the year off traveling around the country, or settling in to learn a new language kind of sabbatical, it’s something doable for us. No selling the house. No homeschooling Nola. Although putting our lives on hold in exchange for some adventure sounds appealing, I know myself and my husband enough to know that a month away is something we can handle, both financially and mentally. But truthfully, I thought that my husband would instantly dismiss it. We’ve taken on more expenses in our new house and money’s not flowing as freely as it had in our earlier roller coaster beach frolicking years. I’m not quite sure what made me bring it up yesterday. To my surprise, as he chopped vegetables for salad, he said “I can take January off”. And in his cautious, but excited (and really cute) way, he asked me some questions about the apartment and the circumstances under which I came to know about it.



The bottom line is that this may become a reality. We may actually be able to go to Mexico next January for a month. My financial estimations indicate that we could spend a month there for about the same cost as a week at the resort we’ve loved.

I’d love to hear from anyone out there who has done this. I’d be very interested in information about the El Centro section of Cancun. What is it like on a daily basis? We’ll have to grocery shop and live for a while in a city where we don’t speak the language. How did you handle taking your kid out of school for that time? What was it like?



From Maine to Mexico and back? In the dead of winter? I’m in!



All I’ve got to say is stay tuned . . . further details to come!